{SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.}

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I'm BORED~~~ now still in school.... slacking! hahaa!! I like the guest conductor! AHAHAHA!!! cause he very nice, and patient too. His conducting is also good, haha. and yesterdae was so duh. we guest musicians and the conductor arrived before 9a.m, but we had to wait until 945a.m for prac to start due to some reasons. although can see tat he's quite pissed, but he still remain calm and handled everything properly. which is good... realli professional man! HAHA. okok ppl don mistaken, i don like him as in tat way, just admire him as a conductor..haha.. and todae's prac was eek! I cant play properly, think didnt sleep enough and i'm not paying attention to the conductor. hmph~~ i must go prac when i get hm.... and memorise those stupid notes tat are freaking diff! ah~~ i'll continue blogging later in the night.... haha! CYA CYA~~~~~

5:18 PM;

Monday, January 29, 2007

Ok, haven been blogging for the past few daes... just to update on things... esp for XUEQI to read... since u said i blog too little!! HAHA...

Had my first sco prac with the sco musicians on thurs. it was... scary but fun! haha.. rare opportunity and i'm gonna make full use of it. teachers were very helpful and guided me.. oh and the guest conductor is very friendly too. and he's realli good.haha. liked the piece he composed for my teacher - Gu Dao Sui Xiang. Real nice, although it's of modern style, it still retains abit of tat traditional flavour in it.

School was fun too. except for chinese ensemble, due to some reasons. haha. made quite a number of new friends... oh and there're three jeremys in my class.. my god..haha. teachers were.... ok la. and the guys in our class are somewhat childish..haha. always crapping all the way.hahaha. i like my class. much better than i expected it to be.haha. oh and learned quite alot of things when im there too. esp how to survive in there. hahaha.

HAHA and spent yesterdae clubbing until 1 a.m. Ok i noe it's bad, but once in a while is not bad. esp when u're having lots of stress..haha. and frankly speaking, i cant wait anymore. maybe i shld give up on tat issue. best for both sides, and don hav to spend so much time thinking abt it. time will tell. changes may be made to it, but on the other hand, maybe it'll remain the same. I don wanna think abt all this stuff now. just wanna concentrate on my music and studies~~~~~

1:23 AM;

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Up till now, I realised tat actually there're realli true friends around me. Those tat lend a listening ear, those tat feel unjust for me in some situations, and those, who're just there to help with anything within their means. Luckily I have these friends who're there for me when I need them. I hate those who claim to be my good friends but whenever I met with a problem, they'll just run away or pretend to be busy with other things. This is where true friends come in. I'm realli thankful tat I have all these friends tat acc me when I've hit a rough patch. THANKS!!!

And now, I don even noe wat kind of world I'm living in. It's full of deceit. At least to me la. I dunno who to believe, or who can I trust. Maybe the environment tat i lived in last time cause me to be wat I am now.Even though my close friends trust me alot, I'm sorry to sae tat cause of my character, I'm still wary of everyone, including both of u. Sorry is all tat I can sae to u now. I noe u both will be sad upon knowing this, but this is wat I wan to tell the both of u. I'm sorry. Maybe time will change everything, but the changes will be very slow. Esp to freaky, I noe I've hurt u many times, but u just endure it without saying anything back at me. I noe u must be feeling very terrible these few daes cause I'm treating u as a punchbag for nth. When u qns me abt y I'm doing this, it's more of 'I dunno how to reply u' than 'I don wanna reply u'.. And it's not tat I'm blaming u for not being able to console me, actually I'm realli very relieved and happy tat u're actually by my side, listening to my complaints, my joy and my woes. I'm realli glad to have u as my close friend. And don be sad tat I don trust u completely like how u do, I'm still trying to change my perception on trusting ppl and believing in them. It's difficult to tell u face to face the things I wan to sae thus I'm blogging it down here. Maybe it'll be easier for u to understand wat I'm thinking. I noe u're very nice to me, and frankly speaking, I'm realli very touched. Esp when I'm realli in desperate need of help u're there to help me. Although I'm always saying stupid things to hurt u, u nv once gave up on this friendship. And deep down inside, I'm realli very happy and touched. Maybe by saying all this now wont help by improving the situation we're in now, but this is wat I've got to sae to u...

And xq, at last we're cleared all the misunderstanding. I don wanna lose a good friend like u. And I hope such cases wont happen again. I hate it. I know u're squashed in between and it's difficult for u to breathe properly until we had to resort to quarrelling which made matters worse. U're my best friend, and I don wan anyone or anything to come between us again. I don like the feeling of quarrelling with my best friend over something insignificant. We shld just forget abt all those bad experiences and carry on with life... thanks for siding me and helping me in tat situation. Although I noe tat case will nv be the same again, but thanks anw!!

3:23 AM;

Monday, January 15, 2007

Ok I'm very pissed. how come there are ppl who're so retarded in this world? retard until I dunno wat to sae man. and pls, if u wan to backstab or badmouth me, just do it in front of my face, don act like some asshole and beat round the bush and badmouth abt me. and don MIX topics together. u don even noe a head or tale abt anything and just ASSUME like nobody's business. pls la, get a grip can? ppl may think u're stupid or something. oh and can u don be sooooo sensitive, 'PLS' don judge situations just by wat ppl typed or said. it's freaking dumb and stupid. if I were saying u, tat means i'm saying everyone else who typed the same thing as u. ASK before u ASSUME things. for ur information, i'm not tat free to backstab ppl all dae long, i'm not tat pathetic as to spend my day like tat. moreover, if u didnt do anything bad, u're not scared being said by other ppl, be it by mistake or on purpose. STOP being a HYPOCRITE. it's good advice, or u'll get urself into deep shit some dae. which i think u just did. HAH! saying ppl behind their backs is NOT a very good thing to do, but apparently, u might have been doing it since dunno when tat u feel nth now. I'm 'BEGGING' u to stop doing tat cause u're going to get 'KILLED' by doing this. oh but it's ok if u don take my suggestion into consideration, being that person u are. u might be thinking wat a hypocrite michelle is, saying all this kinds of things. maybe ppl noe u as a sweetie but pls u cant fool me. u can just stick to ur tat bunch of friends and carry on badmouthing me and putting words into my mouth. u can be the bad guy in disguise and i be the good one. HAHA. how cool!! cant wait. oh and another reminder. PLS, and i mean PLS, think twice abt wat u wan to sae next time, or u'll hav to bear the consequences, BIG MOUTH plus KNOW-IT-ALL!!! thank you~ =D

1:16 AM;

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Most people may think or feel that I'm a person who's very difficult to get along with. The truth is, yes I am. Maybe some people may think that I wear masks, but let me ask you, in this world, who doesn't wear masks wherever they go? To some, it may mean that they need to do this to get what they want. To others, it may be a form of protection for themselves. If you insist that I do wear masks, then I would say I choose the latter for the reason. People who don't understand or know me, will think that i'm very cold, very serious and like what i said, difficult to get along. It's true to some extent. If I don't like someone, it'll show on my face. However, I don't do it to make people dislike me. That's how I am. If you can't take it, I have no choice too. I don't go round bootlicking people with different masks or whatever you may think of. But I can tell u I'm not such a person. It's up to you whether you want to believe what I said or not. I just don't like it when people misjudge me without even knowing me. I don't like people to barge into my thoughts and trying to figure out what I'm thinking. And I won't do it on other people. I'll just observe them. And I don't go round backstabbing ppl. Maybe after reading this entry you may think I'm just lying, if it's like that, I don't care. I just need to get it off my chest.

I realised that in this world and society, being straightforward or blunt may just kill you in your future doings. Now I know why those bootlickers won't die earlier than those people who're too straightforward. They have a way to influence people and suck up to them like nobody's business. One more thing I realised is that I shouldn't trust people too much or I'll get myself hurt in the end. Even the closest kin or friend might betray you someday.2006 really taught me many things, be it bad or good. The experiences have taught me to be more cautious of what I do and say. And walls really have 'ears', much to my disappointment. Maybe it's good to keep a low profile from now...........

2:20 AM;

Thursday, January 04, 2007

School starting next week liao.. at last starting, or i'll be so bored at hm. slacking everydae and nth to do one. ARGH!!! But now is good!! AHAHA!!!

Ok, 2006 - quite a bad yr for me. Nth realli went smoothly for me the whole yr. I don give a dame whether i'm principle or not, it doesn't matter to me now. As in, I don realli expect much from sy to give me other chances to showcase my talent in front of other ppl after seeing me play tat badly during the comp. If i'm able to go china next yr, i'll quit sy and go there to learn more things than i can in singapore. I'm much happier there. The life there is better than wat i'm experiencing in singapore now. As for sy, it doesn't realli matter to them whether they hav more pipa players or less pipa players, since they hav good ones this yr. So it doesn't bother me too. I just wanna study and get good results, finish my course and go off to china. Wee~~HAHA!
But, there are some ppl whom i would like to thank for always being there for me when i need a shoulder to cry upon, a listening ear or a crapping khaki! haha! XUEQI - thanks ah, for always being there for me, and waking me up when i was in depression state( u noe when ah) HAHA! and being my 38 friend too.HAHA. I'm gonna watch ur solo and u better play properly hor!! HAHAHA!! FREAKY - hmm aiya i always beat u all tat but u also like nvm. then sorry for always scolding u and getting angry with u when i'm in a bad mood. But now ok liao right? hahaha... And u don be so stressed la.haha. take it easy k? HAHA!! FAISAL - thanks for always crapping with me when i'm in the mood for crapping! HAHA. oh and we two bitches must still stay in contact k? hahah. and hope u get into the course u wan!! cya when u come back!! SUHUI - thanks for being there with me, and giving me advice. hope u can excel in watever u do! STICKIE, LIZZIE, CC - thanks for giving me a wonderful time in mj. I'll treasure it! This yr As, all of u must work hard k!! esp STICKIE!!! JIAYOU EVERYONE!! ok, think im done with all the thanking.HAHA. For now.... CYA~~~~

4:12 PM;